Family Time in the New Year!

This is always a great time of year to evaluate how your family is communicating and staying connected with one another. It's challenging to balance work, school, activities, and other commitments on a daily basis. How can we build on our family relationships and stay connected in the New Year?

In many research studies on family relationships, it has been found that family meal time together can have many benefits.

Family Connection- Having meals together as a family creates a sense of unity. The structure and predictability provides security for your children. It also provides an opportunity for everyone to share something about themselves and their day. It has been found that teens will share and confide more in their parents when they have routine meal times.

Positive Well-Being for Children and Teens- A national study of young children's (age 3-12) found that more mealtime at home was the single strongest predictor of better achievement scores and fewer behavioral problems.

The largest federally funded study of American teenagers found a strong association between regular family meals (five or more dinners per week with a parent) and academic success, psychological adjustment and lower rates of alcohol use, drug use, early sexual behavior and suicidal risk.

Better academic performance- Regular family meal time's help children do better at school. It was found that children and teens that have regular meal time together do better on tests, spend more time on homework, and read more for pleasure.

Social Relationships- Family mealtime help children, especially teenagers, feel more well-adjusted. They have better relationships with others and this could be influenced by the positive relationships within the family. Family meal time also allows for opportunities to role model good conversational skills that can be used outside the home.

Healthier eating habits – Children and teens that have family mealtime together are more likely to develop healthier eating habits, and this has been found to continue into adulthood. Your children are so impressionable and the food choices you make can affect them long term and help them make positive and healthy choices which may decrease their chances of weight issues in the future.

Make a commitment this year to have family meal times at least 3 to 5 times per week. It can be challenging but if you plan ahead there are many benefits this tradition can bring to your family. I still remember my father whistling when it was time for dinner when I was younger. We were often outside playing with friends. There was something very special about eating with the entire family. It provided structure, security, and many of the other benefits listed above.

Wishing you all a year full of love, health, and family connection!

Dr. Nina

Happy Holidays!

Happy Holidays! I hope you had a really special time with your family this season. I really love this time of year. So many great moments....I loved watching my daughter get so excited about all the things that happen during this time of year. The young, innocent, joyful feeling children experience. It reminded me of when I was her age. :) One of the things we did this Christmas was make a homemade gingerbread house. I had to include this pic!

I look forward to the New Year and blogging more!
Wishing you all a safe and blessed New Year!!

Dr. Nina

Fall, Family, and Fathers

Recently, I wrote an article about fathers and their role in a child's life. I wanted to share it with all of you!

Fall, Family, and Fathers
Fall is a perfect time of year for family outings. There are so many great activities offered in the community. The children are excited too, because of the fun things they get to do with mom and dad. They have a chance to spend time with not only mom but dad too.

The father’s role in a child’s life is so important. A recent study reviewed 24 research studies in the past 20 years. They found a child that has an active and regular engagement with their father, or a father figure, influences them in the following ways:

1. less likely to smoke
2. less likely to get into trouble with police/reduce criminal behavior
3. less likely to drop out of school
4. achieve better levels of education
5. develop good friends with children of both sexes
6. have enhanced cognitive skills: intelligence (found to score higher on measures of verbal and mathematical ability), reasoning, and language development
7. feel loved, allowing for healthy self esteem
8. have a sense of security (physical and emotional) = TRUST
9. have emotional support which has been found to help children empathize better with others, better social skills

The studies consistently show that the earlier a father is involved, the better it will be for the child long term. Also, regular and consistent involvement plays a key role in a child’s development.

I encourage all fathers not to doubt their influence and abilities. It’s okay if you make mistakes. You learn by doing. Create rituals with your child. Think of things you can do with your child that will become predictable and reassuring. For example: walking your child to the bus stop, playing a particular game. At times, you may need to be creative, especially if you work long hours or travel. Find ways that your child can be involved. Take your child with you to do errands. Get their input when you can and show them things that you are doing. For example: If you need to get air in your tire, show them how to do it. It’s about exploring and learning together and answering all of their many questions. This is when the bond is strengthened.

My dad passed away six years ago but I can still hear his voice, his messages…”You can do it.” “Go for it!” “I believe in you.” What an impact he made in my life. If it weren't for the role he played in my life, I may not have had the confidence to accomplish many of my goals.

This article is to encourage you to continue doing all that you do. You are making a difference in your child’s life. Embrace the moments and remember the role you play matters and makes an impact.

Proverbs 2:6 “Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it.”

God Bless our Dads,
Dr. Nina

Kids calendars and charts!

Now that school has begun for children it's especially important for children to get on a routine and have good structure in the home. This will help reduce stress which is good for everybody!

My daughter is in school a couple days a week and also in dance, and gymnastics. I want her to know what she is doing each day so I am posting a calendar on the refrigerator that will let her know this! I will use stickers and notes so that she knows what to expect.

I found a website that has some great calendars and other interesting and helpful charts for children. I found a chart on "feelings" that I wanted to share with you.

It's often so difficult for kids to explain how they are feeling but looking at pictures can help. Here's a link to the feeling chart:
http://www.freeprintablebehaviorcharts.com/feeling%20chart%20pdf/feeling%20chart2.pdf

Here's also a link to the main website: www.freeprintablebehaviorcharts.com

Wishing you much parenting success this new school year!
Dr. Nina

Dance Class

This past week, I took my daughter to dance class. I was running about 5 minutes late so when we arrived the class had begun and the girls were in a circle.

My daughter is somewhat shy and is much more comfortable when she is one of the first to arrive and then adjust to other kids coming in the room. So when she saw everyeone in a circle she was hesitant about going in the room. My mother was with me and told Jazzlynn that she has something for her that she can bring with her into dance class. My mother pulled out a small cross from her purse and gave it to her. It evidently was exactly what she needed. She took it from my mother and walked confidently into dance class! :)

She's learned that Jesus keeps her safe and protects her and this cross reminded her of that! So cute...such a tender moment that I wanted to share with all of you!

Dr. Nina

Have you ever had to call 911? I did this weekend!

This past Friday, I was home alone with my daughter. My husband was gone for the night and would be back Saturday. Well at 3:30am my house alarm makes an abnormal sound. I enter my code and it stops but the sound is still on the other side of the house so I enter the code over there too. The keypad shows the fire light and service light on. I thought "It's a malfunction" and I get ready to go back to sleep. Then...suddenly my house alarm is activated again without me doing anything! Okay- so would you be scared? Because I was!

I called 911 and I stayed on the phone with the operator until the police arrived. The operator notified the fire department too since the fire indicator light was on even though my "service" light was on too. I was okay with this since I was scared. Thank goodness my daughter was next to me in bed. It was good to know she was safe.

The policeman arrived and checked the house. He was really nice and I felt safer. The firemen arrived but they did not come in since they found out that the "service" light was on and it was an alarm issue.

I called the alarm company that night too. Needlesstosay, this entire experience was overwhelming and I didn't fall asleep until 6:00am. My daughter was fine with the experience and had no idea what was going on except that the policeman came to our house to make sure everyone was okay and safe....and then she went back to sleep!

She had no idea how worried I was because I played the "calm Mommy role" which can be challenging to do in a situation like this. I am glad it's in the past and I hope I never have to experience this again!

I am so thankful for all the people out there that watch over us and risk their lives for us everyday. God Bless them for their passion and willingness to help all of us.

This moment was a great reminder...

Dr. Nina

Big Brothers Big Sisters

I used to be a Big Sister to a little Boy from Big Brothers Big Sisters. However, once I had my daugther I didn't have the time to continue doing this. My little and I have recently reconnected. We had lunch this past Friday and he's doing good. I hope I can continue to check in with him and guide him if he needs some help.

There are so many children on the waiting list at Big Brothers Big Sisters. In Texas, the waiting list for boys is longer then for girls and I believe this is true on a national level as well.

If you have time and feel led to mentor a little boy or girl, I encourage you to make the phone call to BBBS! It will be a great experience!

Dr. Nina