Validate, validate, validate!

Today I was playing with my daughter on the family room floor. She was a little tired but overall doing okay. She began looking at an "American Girl" magazine, which always has cute things in it. She then says to me, "I want to look at another magazine like this one." I said, "Sorry dear, we don't have another one." She then repeats her request and I repeat my response. Needlesstosay, she was getting more frustrated and my response was not helping.

I was forgetting what she needed and that was validation! Dr. Nina wasn't validating that she was upset becuase she wanted to look at another magazine like the one she had.

Then I said to her, "You really want another magazine like this one...right." "Uh-huh" she said. Then I said, "It makes you sad because you don't have another one like this and that makes me sad too because I wish I had one to give you." She say's, "uh-huh or um-hmm..." and her frustration has now dissipated and she is now climbing on my back! :)

I share this story because it's sometimes difficult to stop and think about what our kids are feeling. We are just responding as we would with adults. Kids need more from us. They need us to help them through their feelings and label the emotions they are experiencing. You will be amazed and how they respond!

All the best,
Dr. Nina